On his first day in hospital I naively thought that he would somehow recover as he was a physically strong and fit individual. On the second day the doctor showed us the pictures of the damage to his brain and explained again that he was not going to make it. I went home and cried so intensely for half an hour that my wife wanted to call the doctor. This was the first time I ever lost someone close to me.

Fortunately one month earlier I witnessed an application of the grief method from Dr. John Demartini. By asking a set of four questions, he demonstrated that grief can be relieved. After my half hour crying, I decided to apply the method to my own feelings of grief about losing my father.

I sat down and wrote the four questions on a piece of paper and started with answering the first question. I stared at the question and let it go through my mind for about half an hour before I could write down the first answer. I was in doubt whether I would be able to work this method by myself after seeing it only once. I started writing answers. The questions were not difficult to answer, but they are questions that need to sink in a little to be able to answer them honestly instead of just writing a reflex. I worked through it for about two to three hours and as I was writing my answers, I could feel my grief become less and a calmness and presence entering my mind. My father was going to die, but with the help of the method I regained myself. It surprised me and felt a bit awkward. Because the common paradigm about grief is that it cannot be dissolved. 

I spent the last few days of my father’s life next to his bed thanking him for all the lessons he had taught me and I explained to him how I wanted to help other individuals with this grief method. He was not able to communicate anymore, but I am certain he somehow understood my words. When he passed away after being in hospital for five days I had such a calm mind that I was able to help my mum and siblings with their emotions and arrange the cremation. 

We made it into a worthy goodbye for him. We even drove with his coffin through the forest where he had been a volunteer for over a decade. At the ceremony I explained to the family and friends how he suddenly passed away. All the time with a calmness in my mind that helped others as well.

Grateful for this method I began studying and practicing the method and sharing it with a few other individuals. The feedback I received from them inspired me to want to share it with even more people. Maybe you are the next person I can help. Thank you.